Mike

I was supposed to have been spending today with my son. He texted me last night to say he wasn't feeling well, his mother also rang me to confirm he had a stomach bug, he'd been sick and suffering diarrhoea.

As much as I hated not spending the weekend with Danny, it gave me the opportunity to do some much needed housekeeping.

I realised yesterday morning that not only did I have no clean crockery or cutlery, but no clean underwear either. That was a bit of a shock to the system. I put a load of laundry on and did some dishes. It's amazing how therapeutic cleaning can be. Its something I remember my mother saying but I never believe it, however the act of picking up piles of dishes, organising them, washing them and putting them away really did feel good. A physical sign of things improving. I still can't find any side plates though which is annoying and worrying considering I only live in a rented bedsit

I'm not used to having to think about these things. Housework, laundry, cleaning. Without meaning to sound too much like a sexist fucking pig, my wife used to take care of all that. Just one more thing I need to get my head around, especially as I'm planning on getting a decent enough place to have Danny come and stay with me.

I've been reading recently about the power of positivity, of affirmations, of mindfulness and well being and it's benefits for mental health. These are all things I'm working towards - as the Serenity Prayer goes: God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, And wisdom to know the difference

Keep your head up and your heart open.
After being with the same woman for over 15 years and coming to the realisation that I'm bisexual, and sudden entrance into singledom, I'm not ready yet for meeting anyone else... let alone the confusion of who I'd want to be in a relationship with.

However, I trust that if I keep my head up and my heart open, good things will come into my life. I use this both figuratively and literally.

By actually keeping your head up, smiling at people as they walk by, and keeping aware of your surroundings, you may notice something or meet someone that you potentially could have missed had your head been down

Go slowly.
With everything. Eating. Talking. Taking a shower. Driving. Even having sex.

I'm noticing that when I am super-stressed out about things, I have a tendency to run around like a lunatic, doing several things at once, often having to re-track my steps because I was so distracted that I left several things out.

I found that my projects, errands, and even my conversations with people became very watered down because I was rushing just to finish.

Now, whenever I feel like I’m rushing to just get things done, I slow down my pace, take a deep breath, and take my time with whatever it is I am rushing to do.

When we slow down, we can taste all the flavors in our food and we digest our meals better. We are better communicators when we talk slower, and we become better listeners.

Be easy.
Or in other words, don’t sweat the small stuff.

I'm realising that most of the issues that are giving me anxiety are completely out of my control, and they are usually things that wouldn’t matter five years, five months or even five minutes from the time.

I'm learning to not get so worked up over the small things, stressing about matters that, in the end, really didn’t make a difference.

So, if you find yourself getting road rage from the guy that cut you off on the highway, let him be. Why get angry and stress yourself out over it? Just be easy.

Did someone on the train bump you as they walked by? Who cares? The cab is packed; it wasn’t her fault. Be easy.